Yesterday I went to the Stations of the Cross for the first time in many years. When I was a kid I remember going with Grandma Burky. The church was packed, waiting for the priest. I remember her looking at my hands, dirty from playing outside, and frowning and shaking her head. You should have clean hands in church. Then the priest came out, with beautiful robes, and an altar boy on each side, each with an enormous candle that took both of their hands to hold upright. They moved slowly down the center aisle, stopping at each station, singing, praying and sprinkling incense. Nothing like that last night.

First of all there were only 10 of us in the church - 10, my first surprise, no full church, no anticipation. Then only one priest came out, no altar boys, no incense, no robes. He started out by saying that there cannot be an bell ringing on Holy Week, he even said he disconnected the outdoor bells so he wouldn't make a mistake. I knew from Ria dying on Easter week that we could not have any music at her funeral, so this was no surprise. Then the priest, elderly with a heavy accent, slowly walked and stood in front of the first station. We each had been handed a booklet with the prayers and recitings for each station, so we opened them and started. As we went from station to station, there was one refrain at the end of our recitation that was always the same, "do with me what you will". It had been a hard week, I'm down with a bad cold, then Laura went into the hospital and had surgery, and I was too sick to even go and see her. Sabra kept me informed and Laura and I talked on the phone, but that's not like being there...do with me what you will, kind of says it all. We cannot be and do everything that we want to, and we certainly don't know what lies ahead, day by day or even minute by minute. But do with me what you will, takes a lot of pressure off. Stations of the Cross, so different from my memories 60 years ago with Grandma, but boy, worth every minute of it. Happy Easter everybody.