Yesterday when Timmy brought in the mail there was a package for me from my Aunt Alice. Now this was a surprise on many levels - Aunt Alice was married to my father's brother and is in her 90's. We only corresponded once a year, at Christmas and I hadn't received a Christmas card from her this year. I thought perhaps she's not well. Anyway, when I opened the box there was a letter on top of the wrapping which I read before looking into the package. Aunt Alice said she was cleaning out nick nacks, saw this and thought of me. I couldn't imagine what it would be, unwrapping the papers, I laughed and then cried...one of the teasel ladies Ria used to make years and years ago.

Maria and Kevin were running the Stork - delivering (thus the name) sandwiches, foods, desserts to businesses, but mostly Bard students. To supplement their income Ria was also making crafts, one of which was the teasel lady, a plump, kerchiefed lady, holding flowers with a teasel face, making it look like a hedgehog. Then I remembered Maria going to the craft fairs and one event jumped into my mind. This was maybe 27 years ago, when Jer was 3.

There was a craft fair in Cold Spring and Maria asked if I could go to watch Jeremy, maybe take him someplace, while she was at the fair from 10 until 2. I said sure, and my friend Crissy decided to come too. "I've always wanted to visit Boscobel in Cold Spring," she said and we agreed to go there with Jer while Ria was at the fair.

Boscobel was beautiful, but we realized a few seconds into the tour that it was not Jeremy's idea of fun. He started to scream "Lets go" and twist and turn, trying to get away. I asked the guide if we could be excused, but the woman, in a strong German accent, said "No, you MUST stay with the group. There is no one to take you out." So we stayed and it got worse and worse. On the second floor both Crissy and I were red faced, sweating trying to control Jer. In the main bathroom the tour guide pointed out the large bathtub and said, "You could drown a bad boy in there." Finally, it was over. Crissy held Jer, who tried to punch one woman in the face, and he bit into Crissy's leather jacket, leaving teeth marks. We went to a deli, got sandwiches and two beers and drove to the river, where there was a nice beach, people feeding swans and sitting in the sun, and we tried to relax, eating our lunch in the car. Just then the noon whistle went off, Jer panicked and huddled under the front seat of the car, shaking in fear. Crissy and I looked at each other in amazement. That kid who had no fear of the guide, the other visitors, us, or anything was terrifed and quiet as a mouse with the noon whistle!

Anyway, just seeing that little teasel lady from Aunt Alice made me think of that day. Maria must have made a 100 of those dolls, I wonder how many will turn up.

The snow that fell last night clung to the trees this morning, making a winter wonderland. I swept off the deck to lay out birdseed and filled the front feeders, got a new cup of coffee and waited. The cardinals, juncos and chickadees were the first to appear at 7am. For a time in the early morning light, they all were motionless in the trees, bright red dots against the snow. A hawk must have been around, and then left not seeing his breakfast, for in union they all again began to eat and flit from feeder to deck to feeder.

Then the blue jays came. Noisy, piggy, stuffing themselves with seed after seed. Not like the cardinals, who politely nibble one seed, look around, wait, then take another nibble. Also, the jays are loud, screaming to each other, screaming for themselves, chasing each other away from their special place.

The squirrels come next on the half hour as if an alarm clock had set them off. I had to laugh because as they jumped from branch to branch they set off avalances of snow, minature blizzards. They are more like the bluejays, glutons, and not nice to each other. The other morning I counted nine, nine competitors, some more interested in fighting than eating.

The last to rise on a cold morning are the woodpeckers, downy woodpeckers that will go for the feeders, but prefer the suet, but today the suet is frozen, a little too hard for their taste.

Birds have been in the news lately - the reports of thousands of them dead, lying on the ground, in several parts of this country and even in Europe. What this mystery means seems to have everyone baffled. I can't imagine my life without birds. They are my meditations, my seditives, my addiction - and my salvation (that might be going a little too far!) When my neighbor Nick's wife died years ago, he went into a deep depression. She had been sickly, but her death was totally unexpected. His mood was so different, not the laughing, joking person he once was and his eyes would fill with tears frequently. Then, something changed him, brought him out of the depths of depression - a fishtank. Yes, he found an old tank in his garage and decided to buy a couple of fish. He told me about it, and I could see something had changed. Then he bought more fish, apparently he had once earlier in his life had fish, so he knew what kinds were compatable and would once in a while, splurge on an expensive, exotic fish. He told me how he would sit and watch those fish for hours. I thought of that this morning - I guess I use the birds like Nick used his fish. Relaxing, calming, amusing. I hope they find out soon what is causing these bird deaths. I need my birds.

Happy New Year - since all the media seems to be looking back over the year, I thought I would do the same, but just break it down to one per season. Spring would have to be the kite flying and bubble blowing festivities in the cemetery. Not gloomy, not sad, I don't think a tear was seen, just the joy of watching the kids running, some with adults trying to get their kite in the air. We all rubbed instant lottery tickets, but no big winners, only one $3 that Paul had. Sabra's tarot reader later said to forget the ruboffs, go right to the lottery and we will have a winner within 3 years.

Summer would have to be Wellfleet, almost the whole family there, lots of laughs, lots of good seafood and Ava spotting the skeleton of what turned out to be a dophin, that came home with Jer and is now on the back porch. The kids gave me a lot of laughs and it was fun to sit on my bed, drinking fundador with Maureen, listening to David Sedaris. John O'Leary's yearly trek to our campsite was fun for all the girls and Sabra and Laura are still talking about midgets and webbed feet.

Fall would be the StreetPainting in Tivoli, working on the pavement between Sabra and Tony and Regina on the other side, doing the Guiness bird, remembering Margaret. The funniest part was that Natalie Merchant and her daughter were working on a square right in back of me. They had live music, a young woman dressed in fancy clothes, little red hat, peacock earrings, and singing all the songs I knew from my past. When she did "Blue Skies" I couldn't help myself and broke into song: "Blue skies, shining at me, nothing but blue skies do I see...never saw the sun shining so bright, never saw ..." I looked up and realized I was within earshot of Natalie and she probably never before had heard anyone sing like that.

Winter would be Rachael and Miles' engagement party - really nice restaurant, good food, everyone dressed up. Rachael looked beautiful and Regina was wearing a topless little dress she kept pulling up. Lots of topless dresses, lots of tugging, lots of pictures and lots of families. Very nice and gave us a glimpse of what is coming at the wedding.

So that's it - the year in a nutshell. Let's see what happens this year-I'm hoping for the lottery.